Do you pass gas in front of your partner? (Shutterstock)
To toot or not to toot?
That is the question.
The signs of a new, blossoming relationship: You talk for hours on the phone, spend a few evenings a week together laughing, falling in love, whispering sweet nothings, sharing your innermost feelings — everything but passing gas in front of each other.
The moment that this hidden rule is broken consider the romance lost. Gone. Thrown out the window. No longer do you look at your partner as that pure, sexy smelling, polite person you fell in love with.
Suddenly you’re too comfortable, the sweet nothings have turned into, “Oh, honey not tonight.” And not long after, the bathroom is no longer a private place, the door remains open when it should be closed… reminiscent of the scene from that movie The Change-Up when the chick on the toilet – door open – says,”Oh, I need to cool it on the Thai food.”
I know some couples who have dated for more than a year and neither dare to break wind in front of each other. It’s as if both of them were born without bowels. Even going number 2 is done so discretely, one waits until the other has gone to work for the day or until they can sneak off and use a public washroom.
It’s a common tactic.
One woman confesses she uses the restaurant next door to avoid using the bathroom when her guy’s at home.
She even went on a week-long vacation in Mexico without using the toilet, according to a blog on the topic at momlogic.com.
“Sure, I ended up with an awful case of constipation — but for me, it was worth it,” the woman said.
“Earlier in my relationship, I was horrified if my husband ever heard or smelled a fart escape, but after more than a decade of marriage, pretty much anything goes,” the woman confessed on the blog.
What’s your take on passing gas in front of your partner? Would you rather stub your toe than even think about breaking wind with your partner present?
It’s okay for guys to pass gas and burp but the ladies cannot … sorry this is a double standard i know .. because once you do that gal’s we then get the right to cheat on your rotten ass !
LOL So much ado about a natural function of the body. I read stories like this and always think back to Bill Cosby who said: “You didn’t have a real father unless he came up to you and said here kid pull my finger”
I totally understand. It took me 3 months before I farted in front my loved one. Now its no holds barred. I’ve farted so much that our place sometime stinks for days. Now the louder the better. Its funny how we evolve in a relationship (yes lets call it an evolution). First we want to put or best foot forward then we are sticking our ass in the air squeezing with all our might hoping the neighbours hear so you have them guessing which one of you have the problem! Crazy i tell you!
Yes, breaching the fart wall does symbolize a certain level of trust/intimacy/whatever.
My wife and I passed that (pun intended) years ago, and I now find that whereas I can produce some real quality farts, she’s got me on quantity. Hands-down.
While I realize it’s a natural body function I see no need to do it in the presence of my wife. I also believe in closing the bathroom door, but that may be out of the fact that I prefer the privacy. I was raised to be polite in front of women and think this falls in to this category, believe me I am no prude, I have a fairly dark sense of humour which my wife (usually) enjoy’s, but passing gas I feel crosses the line. Friends at work say their husbands do, and they don’t care, so I guess it’s to each their own, and when friends do it I find it funny, but I am not romantically linked to them, and would not find a woman doing it funny. Bit of a double standard but think woman have more class then that is all.
Once the relationship moves to the next level, where you move in together, then the time comes where you both spend all your free time together. That’ll be the time where you have to have the “fart talk”. You will also need to deal with other bathroom habits, as well as know what kind of feminine hygiene products she uses, as you will have to go buy it some day.
It took a while, but I think she broke the barrier first while camping and just like Darren, she blows me away hands down.
For a good laugh, check out YouTube video “Breaking the barrier”.
My wife farted during the evening the first time we met. We were comfortable enough with each other from the get-go … what’s the hang-up?
Great I can give my wife Dutch Oven for our 10th anniversary
Hey Chris, that YouTube video is hilarious. Thanks for your post.
So are they saying woman go number 2 as well ?????
A fart is very innocent thing, really nothing more than a little rift of wind looking for a home…………NOT !!!
Husbands and wives reach all sorts of “accomodations” when it comes to air-biscuits. My preferred approach is a) never in front of company and b) there will be no discussions and no recriminations. I believe wives hate “the wind”, but they hate discussing it all the more!!
My parents were a bit more prescriptive: all “styles” were allowed between 6 and 10 am and there were to be no commentary whatsoever. After that window of opportunity, the “statute of limitations” expired and one was expected to either attach a silencer or go to the other end of the house.
I opt for the “silencer” approach in public, but let me warn you that this will not work if you have just had a colonoscopy. In that delightful procedure, more that just a Harley Davidson headlight is rammed up towards your tonsils!! You are pumped full of air, and it eventually WILL come out. If you have this procedure done, please be considerate to your fellow human beings and give them a wide berth for about the next 4 hours. I wasn’t so lucky after my first “camera shoot”. I exited the TTC subway, climbed the stairs to my condo’s passageway, felt the earth about to shift and then let go a shock-wave capable of shattering granite!! I should have kept walking, eyes straight ahead, but was stupid enough to look back. There behind stood a sweet old lady, so frozen in shock and fear that she could not even blink. I did the only thing I could do, which was to say “excuse me”……then resumed walking. Gosh I hope she survived.
I should also point out that a sincere discusion of farting – kept within the confines of “family” – can be very instructional. One time around the dinner table, after the women folk had escaped to the gazebo, my Dad, brother and brothers-in-law sat around the kitchen table “trying to trump each other’s ace”. I’ve forgotten who, but someone had the temerity to ask if Mom’s farts were loud. Dad ponered that for a moment and then advised “in Mom’s case, it’s not so much a matter of volume, it’s more a matter of torque”. Wow!! I’d always had an intuitive grasp of horsepower, but could never fathom “torque”. Bless my Dad for using something so simple to explain something so complex!!
I always walk away, another room, another aisle in a store…..I try my best not to let people have to inhale my farts. Just because you are comfortable with someone doesn’t mean you should poison them.
Our mother always swore that she never tooted. Would always tell us boys to go to the bathroom when we felt it coming. I don’t know about the rest of you…. but… I cannot outrun a fart once it starts its journey.
Well, guess what.. many years ago, at a family function.. neither could she… Her comment… “Was that me? Sorry”. Of course I could not let her off that easily!!!