You’ve probably already heard about the apparent murder of the Russian technician blamed for the failure of an animatronic snowflake to morph into one of the Olympic Rings during the opening spectacle at the Winter Games in Sochi.
The story got quite a viral online workout over the weekend with lots of comments expressing shock and outrage.
The story goes something like this…
The man responsible for operating the Olympic Rings during last night’s Winter Olympics opening ceremony in Russia was found dead today.
According to local reports the body of Boris Avdeyev was found his hotel room early this morning with multiple stab wounds.
Avdeyev was a technical specialist responsible for the Olympic Ring spectacle, which embarrassingly malfunctioned last night. Five animatronic snowflakes were supposed to transform into Olympic Rings. The first four functioned properly but the fifth snowflake failed to change shape.
Although his body was badly mangled and the wounds were consistent with a struggle, so far officials say they don’t suspect foul play.
“Sure there were stab wounds and bruises all over the body,” admits the lead investigator on the case. “But who knows what caused them. Maybe he tripped and fell on a set of knives. Right now we’re ruling this an accidental death.
“It’s terrible when accidents like this happen. But then again, maybe Mr. Avdeyev should have thought twice before he screwed up the Olympics. Accidents tend to happen to people who betray Russia.”
Despite the government’s story, fellow hotel guests reported hearing a struggle in Avdeyev’s room around 3 a.m. local time.
Actually, the story goes exactly like that because that’s the original story as it appeared on the dailycurrant.com website Saturday under this headline:
“Man Responsible For Olympic Ring
Mishap Found Dead In Sochi”
The problem is the story is a complete fabrication, a joke story perpetrated by the self-styled “satirical” Daily Currant website, sort of a poor man’s theonion.com.
Unfortunately — as so often happens with these things — a lot of people took the story at face value and the rumour spread far and wide.
The Daily Currant has run other “stories” with headlines like Vladimir Putin Kills Grizzly Bear With Bare Hands and Vladimir Putin Dedicates Sochi Winter Olympics To Stalin. Fun stuff like that. Jerks.
But, no, nobody (as far as we know) — especially no invented character named Boris Avdeyev — has been beaten up and murdered for botching the Olympic opening ceremony.
Of course, the Russian television audience never got to see the ring goof-up anyway. Producers for the host broadcaster, Rossiya 1, quickly subbed in pretaped video from a rehearsal in which all five rings opened without a hitch.
And now back to our regularly scheduled programming…