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October Horror Show! The Sabres are so bad they could use the Grim Reaper

- October 30th, 2014

Unless you’re a Carolina Hurricanes fan, it doesn’t get much worse than the Buffalo Sabres, a failing NHL club that has managed just 11 goals through 10 games this season.

They’ve been shut out in four of their last six games, ending with a 4-0 shellacking at the hands of the embattled Toronto Maple Leafs earlier this week.

With the Buffalo Bills still playing meaningful football well into October – yes, that’s rare – the Buffalo News has shifted its attention to tearing a strip off the city’s hockey franchise.

Adam Zyglis, a cartoonist with the paper, came up with this “Horror Show” beauty in Thursday’s edition.

Add up the results from the dates listed in the cartoon and it’s easy to see how bad this Sabres team actually is.

Over the six games mentioned, Buffalo lost by a combined 27-5.

Come to think of it, maybe Zyglis should correct his cartoon.

Wouldn’t the Grim Reaper be more apt, seeing as he’d be able to put Sabres fans out of their misery?

Happy Halloween, Upstate New York.

Caps’ Chimera has nose rearranged, misses less than half period

- October 30th, 2014

NHL players know a couple of things come with the territory: They’re gonna lose some teeth and their face will probably get rearranged at some point.

After Wednesday’s game against the Detroit Red Wings, Washington Capitals forward Jason Chimera is living testimony to the latter. I’m guessing that as a long-time NHLer, he’s already experienced the former.

Chimera tried to throw a hit on Red Wings defenceman Brendan Smith early in the first period but didn’t come out of it unscathed. Not by a long shot.

Somehow, Chimera’s nose took the brunt of the damage, as you can clearly see in the video below. (The money shot, such as it is, comes about 46 seconds in. And, yeah, it is pretty gnarly so you’ve been warned.)

But, being the hockey player he is, Chimera had his broken nose fixed up and played the rest of the game.

He missed six minutes of play. Yes, you read that right. Six minutes.

That, friends, is the epitome of toughness.

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NFL cheerleaders lose team-issued outfits to don creative Halloween wear

- October 29th, 2014

Who says it’s the “No Fun League”?

Cheerleaders around the NFL this week donned Halloween garb in place of their typical team-issued outfits.

And some of the costumes were actually pretty creative – particularly the Tennessee Titans’ “Laces Out” girl crouching down in the front row.

Our renowned costume analysts took a shot at figuring out what each of these young ladies is dressed as.

Here it goes:

(Back row L to R) Wonder Woman, Minnie Mouse, Fire Fighter, Cat (Cheetah?), Pilot, Tina Turner, Bat Girl, The Green Lantern.

(Front row L to R) Jasmine, Football, Hippie, Mario, Luigi.

Scroll down to check out some of the other costumes that appeared on sidelines around the NFL this week.

Then check back Thursday to see our gallery of athletes dressing up this year.

(L to R) Cheetah, Pirate, Princess of some kind, Valentines Day lingerie, Unknown

(L to R) Wonder Woman, Robin, Normal cheerleader?

There are a lot of repeats here.

A few things stick out here – Tinker Bell (front left). And what appears to be a Marilyn Monroe attempt (front right).

Sens’ Chris Neil appears to issue Jackets’ Jared Boll eye gouge

- October 29th, 2014

We’re “not sure” what it was, either.

But it certainly looked like an eye gouge from Ottawa Senators tough guy Chris Neil Tuesday night.

Towards the end of a first-period dust-up between Neil and Columbus Blue Jackets’ Jared Boll, Neil appeared to rake his left hand into Boll’s right orbital.

When the referees separated the duo, Boll struggled to open his right eye.

Both received fighting majors for the incident.

Neil received an unsportsmanlike conduct penalty for, uh, pulling a stunt usually reserved for the WWE.

Neil appeared to have an explanation afterward. And Boll seemed to acknowledge it.

Who knows how genuine it was.

WATCH: Single punch ends North American Hockey League fight

- October 28th, 2014

Ever heard of the North American Hockey League?

Me neither. (While doing a search, there are two leagues with the same name, although the league in question is the professional loop with teams mainly based in Quebec, and not the junior league in the U.S.)

But, hey, they have some guys who can throw.

During a game between the Cornwall River Kings and Sorel-Tracy Eperviers last Friday, Guillaume Coude and Dylan Garrioch dropped the gloves.

Then, in one devastating punch, Garrioch crumpled to the ice, coming dangerously close to banging his head on the surface.

Watch how Coude seemingly mesmerized Gerrioch by twirling his right hand before landing some sweet chin music.

The video is undoubtedly of “viral” interest.

But there are some dark undertones to it.

We profiled Garrioch back in 2011 after he sought help for depression issues from the same doctor who treated Pittsburgh Penguins star Sidney Crosby during his bout with concussion issues.

“When you take 500 shots to the head, there’s going to be some damage,” Garrioch told us at the time.

It seems that number has since gone up.